The Gluttonous Golden Satellites

You guys. I really can't be bothered to talk about the Golden Satellites (a.k.a. The International Press Academy, who can't even be bothered to update their own website) and here's why: When you nominate everyone* under the sun, it's hard to take you seriously. The Satellites have more categories than any of the important precursors and then, as if the orgy of categories weren't enough, they have 7 to 10 nominees in every category. I kid you not. It's... insanity. I can't care. But if you must, Awards Daily has the list.

*Even when you nominate 7-17ish people per category (some categories are doubled up between types of genre) you will still, rather amusingly, be snubbing people who are noteworthy. How do you have 7 comedy actress nominees, for example, and not include Emma Stone in Easy A? Her movie may be a frail invalid but she is its primary caregiver, its walker, its equilibrium, its lifeblood, its court jester, its boss, and its whole goddamn raison d'etre. And whenever her movie starts death rattling she performs CPR. Shunning her in a category of 'let's nominate everyone!' is S-T-U-P-I-D. I don't expect Emma to win favor with the Golden Globes either exactly, but since they'll only have 5 nominees the shunning won't be as tough to take. I'm expecting that we'll see: Bening, Hathaway, Hawkins, Moore, and ??? as the five girls walking the red carpet as "comedy" nominees once the Globes roll into town. But I sure wish someone would recognize the "comedy" in the comedy category and throw Stone a bone.